Sorry that it's been so long between posts.
The Good: My Mom came to visit for a week while Acey was on Spring Break. She was a great distraction. As you can imagine, Acey takes a lot of entertaining and a full week of it would have been a bit much for me. Mom was able to listen to his continuous stories, theories on life, his experiments, etc, etc. I was able to sleep :).
Mom was also a HUGE help when it came to packing. She was able to clear out Acey's bedroom and pack other parts of the house. Plus, at night she would tell Acey stories about Rampart. He LOVES when his grandma tells him stories of Rampart - he is fascinated by them.
Acey has also changed Mom's name from Grandma to "GRAND Mother" - two words :) or "The Ancient One." He tells me that "The Ancient One" is a Chief of ALL the Native People. Because he sees people coming up to her all the time, I guess he assumes she MUST be important and Chiefs are important :). His thinking and the way he looks at life is way beyond his years.
The Bad: I did very little exercising, which is bad both physically and mentally. Getting out and walking helps to clear my mind and appreciate everything around me. I did do some stationary bike riding but, honestly, it wasn't much. Jay and I did get out and walk today.
The Ugly: "CHEMO" even the word makes me nauseous. This round of chemo has taken a lot out of me - I believe I have had every side effect that it can cause. The fatigue and nausea were the worst. One day I dropped Acey off at school, came home and slept until 3:30. I was almost late picking him up.
The cold sensitivity has really been debilitating this time around. The only way I can explain it is that the nerves in my hands and feet become painful when they get cold. It feels like when your hands or feet fall asleep and you have the sensation that needles are stabbing you - multiply that feeling by 100 - that's what it feels like. It isn't fun, but if I run them under hot water the sensation goes away. So, I have been living in warm socks and mittens ;)
Chemo is my friend and my enemy. I say that I "HATE" it, but know that it will make me better. The best approach is for me to stay positive, which is easier said than done - this week has been rough. I am trying to change my thinking so that I can get through the next round.
It has been a "Gidget Pity Party" this week :), and I definitely need to change my negative thoughts into positive. So, that is my GOAL... I will let you know how I do.
Posts
To all you Gidget Supporters - Joyce and I are spending about a week and a half with Gidget and her family.
ReplyDeleteI can tell you that she is doing a great job in overcoming her "Ugly" moments. She is willing to share her status and her feelings and that is good therapy in itself.
Gidget - we are very proud of you, love you very much and will continue to pray for you every day. It is just hard to believe how very well you are handling the entire situation.
Ed and Joyce
Gidget, who is the little and cute puppy you are holding? You won't believe this but we have a puppy - Spot - a Jack Russell Terrier. Now i care for one college freshman, one 9 year-old, three cats, two birds, one lizard, and a puppy! i can send a photo if you like.
ReplyDeleteYou are so brave. I wish my dad could be here to cheer you on. Please let me know if you need/want someone to come to the chemo with you - i have lots of experience with that and would love to be there if you need me to. There really aren't words for what this is - please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. PS - i love that your mom is telling Acey those important stories.
Gidget,
ReplyDeleteIt is OK to feel down and negative sometimes. The key is to acknowledge it and express your feelings, then you will come out of it in a more positive state of mind. If you bury your feelings it will have a worst impact on you. This is what I have found to be true during struggles in my life.
I can understand how you "hate" chemo yet know it is needed. My siblings and I were always torn when our Dad was to have his chemo treatments, knowing how miserable he would be from the side effects. We just had to focus on making him as comfortable as we could and hope the nasty drugs would be for a better future. My husband's family also experienced it with their Mom and she has been cancer free more than 11 years.
It is great that you have family visiting from Alaska and Texas and that they are so helpful. Packing can be so tiresome.
Thanks for sharing your feelings with us. Hang in there!
You are allowed to be on a pity party anytime you want to. My partner's mom was in Mexico just starting her retirement and had a sudden heart attack and died. She was like a mom to me and I'm still crying over it. We had a beautiful service in Chicago for family and will have another one in Seattle this weekend. I know that you will live until 100. I could never handle losing you. You are so strong and brave. E-mail me sometime, so I can see you in person.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Laurie
Hang in there Gidget, you are one brave lady! Acey sounds like he has such a sweet and giving heart and spirit. I know you are proud of him. I am lifting you up in prayer and asking the Lord to get you through each step of this journey. Love and prayers, Joan
ReplyDeleteGidget-
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. The Good will only continue to get better because YOU are so wonderful - you mean so much to all of your family and freinds - we love you lots and lots! The Bad won't last - you have been inspiring me to walk and you will start again soon, I just know it. The Ugly sounds dreadful - but in being brave and sharing how chemo makes you feel, you get the ugliness out and you remain as beautiful as ever =-). Can't wait to see you in a couple of weeks - put a paintbrush in my hand and I will get busy! Just think, you are getting closer and closer to living in your new house AND closer to the end of your rounds of chemo - both the Best news! Love you, Mel
Just talked to your Mom and she said that you have round number 6 tomorrow. We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteHey Lady:
ReplyDeleteYou taught me a lesson yesterday working together on your new house. No matter how challenging life is just get on with it! You are doing such an outstanding job Gidget and your emotional strength as well as your drive to get your new home ready is amazing. You have it in you to be strong through the rest of the treatments and then get on with your life!
For all of you that can't see their new home it is going to be beautiful. It is nestled up at the top of a hill surrounded by trees and the peace and quiet up there is very restful.Every window you look out is a snapshot of the forest and is is all so calming and beautiful! The inside has changed so much since I saw it a month ago I think that Jay and Gidget need to go into the house flipping business!
Good job guys! Love Meridee